ok, i get it, you're in "love"

Yesterday I was walking down the street, in a good mood (read: Bailey's in my coffee) with Ela when she decides to do one of her characteristic middle-of-the-sidewalk (why wait for grass?) poops. Not a big deal. She finishes, I pick up, we're good. But as I look up, there's a wall of people coming down the sidewalk towards me. Fine, we can squeeze through, only the people I'm trying to squeeze past are a couple, holding hands, and apparently, unwilling to let go.

Instead, they lift their arms making a little arch for me, dog, and dog poop, to pass under. Problem: they're like, 5'3 and 5'7, respectively. I'm 5'9 and wearing heels. Its fucking ridiculous. Really? You can't unclasp hands for the 2.5 seconds it will take me to get by you? I have to crouch down to pass under your midget-bridge? If I hadn't had a leash in one hand and a bag of shit in the other I totally would have karate chopped their hands apart.